The Biggest Loser Principle

I've had coffee with many groups of mothers over the years and always heard similar conversations. Someone will raise a parenting issue that they are struggling with, and despite plenty of suggestions, none will really seem like the right solution to this problem. Having been a mother for over 11 years now, I know that more than our ideas, other mothers really just want our support. Because, to deal with most parenting problems, you have to face the fear of change before you're ready to actually make any change.

This topic came up with a colleague the other day, and I suggested that it's like The Biggest Loser. All of those people on the show, at some point realise that the way things are is much worse than the could be if they changed. As my friend put it, "The pain of change is less than the pain of remaining the same." I think this is a pretty good principle in life - the Biggest Loser Principle.

We can offer our friends, co-workers, family and clients all sorts of advice and support, but ultimately, people only change when the scales swing in favour of change and they find the inner strength to move towards that preferred outcome rather than stay in their comfort zone. That's when we need to be good friends and step in as their cheer squad when their motivation and enthusiasm fades. But, we can never get that ball rolling. Only they can. Just like on The Biggest Loser.

Flying with Kids

I'm about to take my 9 year old son with me to New Zealand to visit my grandmother. This is the second time I'm taking one of the kids to visit her, having taken my daughter 2 years ago when she was 5.

I'm becoming a savvy traveller with kids, and this time, instead of buying the cheapest airfare I could afford, I've made sure I've got the cheapest package I could find.

You see last time, I flew with a no-frills, no-food airline. I'd packed plenty of games and books and food to get us through the 3 hour flight, but I hadn't thought about what would happen if the person beside us wasn't so organised. True to Murphy's Law, the person beside us was the mother of a flight attendant, so she received every bit of food and drink complimentary, as well as the use of one of those little DVD things they have on those airlines. My daughter managed to cope with the feelings of jealousy, long enough for us to get out of the airport and into a McDonald's store when we finally arrived in Auckland.

Then on the return trip, I convinced her to have a sleep and I'd buy her a hot breakfast rather than eat in the very expensive airport before our 7am flight. That was all good, except that the airline put us up the back of the plane because of her age, and by the time the food cart got to us they'd sold out of hot breakfasts. Once again, we coped long enough to crawl through immigration and find Daddy and the boys, who were only too happy to take us out to breakfast after our week away.

This time around, I've chosen to fly with Air New Zealand. I'm looking forward to having breakfast on the plane, a nice cup of tea, and watching a movie while my son does the same thing beside me. It won't matter what other people do, because this is true luxury for our family!

Sometimes, you really do get what you pay for, but as that MasterCard ad reminds us, what price do you pay for peace and no stress? It's priceless.