I was speaking to a parent this week about the pitfalls of parenting a teenage girl when it comes to back chatting, shaving legs and sibling rivalry. It's made me realise that my six-year old's "You did my hair wrong!" tantrums will get a lot worse than "I did my hair wrong!" ones.
There seem to be 2 main issues that trouble girls as they near the end of primary school - body concerns and friendship problems. The issues of body concerns often feed into friendship problems as young women seek to adjust how the look to 'fit in' with their peers. So what can we do as parents? Well these are my well-researched ideas:
- Panic, eat a bar of chocolate, watch a movie with a happy ending and then sit down with a cup of tea and ponder adolescence.
- Set a good example - don't change your own outfit 15 times before going out for dinner and don't keep trying different diets only to put on more weight that you started with.
- Make food a source of pleasure and ensure your family is eating together around the table as often as possible.
- Talk openly about body shape and bring up the disadvantages of being a stick insect.
- Be willing to give in on the little things. Yes we all know that shaving your legs is a good thing to delay, but no teenager is going to believe you, so instead invest your energy in negotiating a workable compromise - when can they start, who will pay for all the stuff they need and what you're actually saying yes to.
- Talk up exercise for all it's benefits - managing weight, stress relief, feeling positive and being social. One day they might actually believe you! Eat another chocolate bar and sit down with another movie - adolescence is a long road, and you're going to need to pace yourself!
Of course, some of these may be harmful to your own body image, so please consult your own common sense before implementing all of my suggestions.
No comments:
Post a Comment